“If you are ashamed of it you have no business doing it”.
That’s the wisdom imparted to me by my student in rehab today. His grandfather told him that, when he was complaining to him during his first stint in jail. There were many more after that, but a sense of integrity radiates from him, through the fog of questionable choices.
He’s been working with the 5 remembrances for a few weeks and the one that resonated first was “My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand.”
Not surprisingly though, as he prepares to witness his mother’s passing, the fourth one is really hard: “All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them.”
I’m pushing him though. To look at it. And as I push him, I push myself. He becomes a mirror as I look at the way I deal with grief and change (not terribly graceful…) and we walk each other through, hesitantly, but with care.